Scientists say they have split the sub-level

Scientists at Carterton University’s Centre for Learning claim to have split the sub-level. 

The breakthrough was made by a team of educational scientists who have been working on the problem since 2005. ‘We knew there had to be a way to do this,’ said scientist Rupert Hardman. ‘Our initial lab tests indicated that the potential to split the sub-level was there. Now, thanks to technological advances we have finally been able do it.’

The sub-sub-level will allow teachers to pinpoint children’s progress much more accurately, and will do a great deal to ensure that the last traces of spontaneity and individuality are banished from the classroom. 

Though small, these traces are still present in most schools and represent a considerable threat to children.

Hardman warns, however, that the sub-level must be split in a controlled environment. ‘Sub-level fission can unleash an enormous amount of very powerful educational bullshit,’ he said.

Powerful sub-sub-levels are released in sub-level fission procedure